I was the only woman in the gym for about an hour yesterday, and since I was off in a corner quietly working on my stretches, free weights and ab crunches, I guess the guys forgot I was there.

    One of them started grumbling that he has to take his wife shopping in Burlington on the weekend. From the intensity of the round of commiserating murmurs that went out from the other guys, I'm guessing that they would seriously weigh the cost/benefit of poking an eye out to be relieved of this task.

    The guy went on to complain that his wife had to try on EVERYTHING in a store, even things she had no intention of ever buying, just because she had to see how it would look on her.

    The volume and intensity of the commiserating murmurs increased.

    And then the clincher. He asked his fellow tripods why women couldn't be like men ... you know, grab one thing, try it on, and if it fits, buy it.

    I lost the rest of the conversation because it was at that moment that I had my epiphany.

    Omigawd, I Shop Like A Man.

    I am letting my gender down.

    You can well imagine my sense of consternation.

    In my defence, I'd like to point out that part of the problem here is that I'm a fairly tall woman, just a bit under 5'10". This means that when I try on standard women's clothes which are scaled for women between 5'5" and 5'6", I tend to look like Dr. Bruce Banner making his transition to The Incredible Hulk.

    Except for the green bit, of course.

    Just wipe the green bit right out of your mind.

    Yep, with almost all women's clothing, the sleeves are always part ways up my arms, the shirt tails aren't long enough, and pants always look as if I'm expecting to wade through a flood of Biblical proportions.

    So when I find a brand that makes things that actually fit me, I tend to stride past everything else to that brand, buy two of whatever I need in the same style but different colours, and call it a day.

    This type of clothing tends to be sporty and often plaid.

    Yes, my wardrobe is as scintillating as my life, eh. Maybe it needs a shake up.

    I do have an affinity group out there, folks who yearn for a bit of feminine glitz but find it hard to find in their size.

    Now, if I can just find out where the drag queens shop ...

--Marn

Remember, until Valentine's Day:

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