2001-06-30
Dear Diary:

����So yesterday the spousal unit sprang out of bed -- nekkid, he being a guy who sleeps in his birthday suit -- ran downstairs and then tore out into our yard waving his arms and yelling.

����I would like to state for the record that it had nothing to do with my cooking.

����Not this time, anyhow.

Maybelline, when she caught sight of a middle-aged nekkid guy running towards her, waving his arms and yelling.  I'm not sure, but I think she was smirking.����No, it had everything to do with Another Woman, a beauty I have christened Maybelline because, in the words of the immortal Chuck Berry, she's started back doing that thing she used to do ...

����Which would be treating my beloved gardens as Marn's All U Can Eat Exotic Plant Buffet.

����Paul spotted her through our bedroom window happily munching on my astilbe when he woke up, so throwing modesty (among other things) to the wind he rocketed outside to put a stop to that bit of nonsense.

����Good thing we live in the middle of the woods, huh? (Although, since it's been about 25 years since I've lived in a city, for all I know every morning nekkid men run out in their suburban yards, waving their arms and yelling, eh.)

����Did I tell you I've decided to research this subject carefully this fall 'cuz I'll be spending some time in the 'burbs of Sydney? Expect a full report -- and pictures -- if I find nekkid men yelling, waving their arms, and running around their yards in Australia.

����Hey, this isn't going to be just a vacation, this is going to be serious anthropological research. After all, MarnCo, the multinational behind The Big Adventure, believes in delivering value for Your Consumer Dollar.

����Oh, wait, Diaryland is free which means this is worth �

����Um, nevermind.

����Oh dear, all this value for your consumer dollar and nudity in the 'burbs speculation has me off track yet again. I KNOW I had a point here �.

����Oh yeah, deer and gardens, I was talking about deer and gardens.

����I guess this is the part where I have to admit that part of the blame for Maybelline's reappearance in my life lies with me.

����I got cocky.

����Hadn't seen a deer in eons, so I got a little casual about spreading the "no deer" around the property, hadn't been resprinkling after every rain.

Well, at least she left me the blossoms, eh.����My roses have paid dearly for my slackitude. If you look closely at this picture, you'll see they have hardly any leaves. Yep, it appears Maybelline has a thing for roses, or their leaves, anyhow. Too bad she can't find some young buck to shower her with roses so she can leave MY plants alone.

����* Sigh. *

����Oh well, one good thing did come out of this.

����I now have pictures of the spousal unit, wedding tackle bobbing in the wind, chasing Another Woman around the yard.

����Too bad I was laughing so hard that none of them are quite in focus.

--Marn

Old Drivel - New Drivel


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Want to delve into my sordid past?
She's mellllllllllllllting - Wednesday, Feb. 15, 2012 - Back off, Buble - Monday, Dec. 19, 2011 - Dispersed - Monday, Nov. 28, 2011 - Nothing comes for free - Monday, Nov. 21, 2011 - None of her business - Friday, Nov. 04, 2011 -


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