����Is it just me, or do you feel they should subtitle The Winter Olympics with the phrase "Stupidly Dangerous Things You Can Do On Ice And Snow"?

����I mean, most of these sports look like stuff you'd do on a dare. "Hey, I dare you to hurtle down an icy, twisting mountain path on two narrow pieces of wood."

����"Hey, let's build a really narrow twisting tunnel of pure ice and see who we can con into rocketing down it in a bobsled ... oh wait, that offers too much protection ... how about a luge ... oh, wait, let's make it REALLY exciting and see if we can get someone to do it on a skelton!"

����So yeah, I have something of a problem watching most Olympic sports. If the judges aren't living in some sort of alternative reality (think the artistic forms of skating such as pairs or dance) then the danger factor of the sport drives me mental.

����For a while I was enjoying speed skating, that is until one of the commentators mentioned that speed skaters have kevlar collars (kevlar being the stuff they use to make bullet proof vests) so that if they take a skate to the throat during a tumble, they won't die on the ice.

����Well, so much for that sport.

����So now I'm pretty much reduced to watching curling, a sport Canadians dominate because it is stupefyingly dull and involves rocks, ice and Unfortunate Fashion Choices, three things we know a lot about. (It's no accident the French women's curling team didn't win a game, eh. Until they get the Unfortunate Fashion Choices mojo working, those poor people are NEVER going to get curling.)

����The spousal unit has developed an somewhat unsettling attachment to the Canadian women's curling team and drops whatever he is doing to watch them play. He feels the sport would break out into the big time if only the women curlers would dress like the women's ice dance competitors.

����This image is so wrong, on so many levels, I can only contemplate it in short bursts.

����Speaking of images that are so wrong, on so many levels that they can only be contemplated in short bursts, have I mentioned that I desperately yearn for my very own costume Just Like The Canadian Speed Skaters Wear?

����I mean, look at this. Does it not scream Super Hero to you? Is it not just about the coolest thing you have EVER seen in your life? Huh? HUH?

����Oh yeah, if I had a suit like that, I could become Canada Woman--faster than a waddling beaver, more powerful than a bowl of steaming poutine, able to leap an inukshuk with a single bound, eh.

����And let me just say for the record right now that if I should manage to ever luck into one of these costumes, I promise to only use my powers for good.

����Really, the only thing the costume needs to make it complete is a snazzy hat, and I think we can all agree that I have THAT nailed.

����Oh yeah, I'm ALL about The Snazz, eh.