If only my cat, Norma, was actually Harrison Ford in disguise ...

The story begins years ago, when my friend Annie gifted me with some wonderful goat's milk soap. I stock up on it every winter now because it helps a lot with dry skin problems.

The soap has an um, er, ah somewhat musky scent. It's not exactly goat-y, but it's definitely not the usual floral note that most soaps strike. I like the smell, myself. The verb "like", though, does not begin to cover my cat Norma's reaction to this soap.

Remember Gonzo the Great from the Muppet Show? Remember how he'd rocket into a scene with a kind of odd WHOOOSH sound? I sweartogawd, the minute I start my shower and the first molecules of that soap's scent waft through the house, Norma WHOOSHES from wherever she might be in the house and parks herself in front of the bathroom door.

The minute I open the door my normally aloof tabby cat begins to frantically weave herself through my legs. If my legs are bare, she begins to rub her face along my calves, marking me as hers. Of course, rubbing herself on my legs gives her a bonus dose of the wonderful, musky goat's milk soap goodness.

Clearly, it is almost more goodness than the cat can handle, because Norma then topples over on to my feet. Her eyelids drop until they're half open. Her mouth opens slightly and she inhales, something cats do when they encounter a particularly intriguing odour. She looks up at me with adoration. Occasionally she will make little squawks of bliss. You can almost see the thought bubble above her head:

OMIGAWD, BUT YOU SMELL WONDERFUL. WAIT. DID I SAY WONDERFUL? YOU DON'T SMELL WONDERFUL, YOU SMELL FABULOUS.

Now I have been using this soap for many years. The spousal unit has never once remarked upon the smell of it. During that time we've had several cats. Not one cat has ever reacted to this soap before either. But Norma, one whiff of this soap and Norma becomes my love slave. If there is such a thing as a kitty aphrodisiac, then this soap is Norma's Love Potion #9.

Yep, if only my cat was actually Harrison Ford in disguise ...

*Sigh*

--Marn

Mileage on the Marnometer: 31.4 piddling miles
Goal for 2004: 1,000 miles - 1609 kilometers