Maple syrple season is in full swing now.

One of the traditions of our sugar house is that visitors get a home-made doughnut that they can dip into a mug graced an inch or so of hot maple syrple fresh from the sugar arch. Mmmmmm, home made doughnuts, their outsides a rich, crispy caramel brown, their insides a lovely, sweet, dense, cakelike goodness seasoned with a whisper of nutmeg.

It is an insanely good combination.

Do I eat this unique treat which is only available for a few weeks every year?

Oh, no.

We can be in the sugar house for seven or eight hours running, so my brother-in-law also thoughtfully provides a wide range of healthy snacks, too, such as fruit.

Do I eat this?

Oh, no.

No, for me he provides a food not seen in nature.

For me he always makes sure there is a large supply of those nuclear orange, not even barely food-like batons immortalized in my mind under the generic term of "cheesy poufs".

Hello, my name is Marn, and despite the fact that I work out three times a week in a gym, and try to prepare meals that involve a disgusting amount of whole food, in the end I am the love slave of cheesy poufs.

Cheesy poufs.

Is there any sight more pitiful than a woman in her 50's, cheesy pouf crumbs coating her lips, her fingers died an orange not seen in nature from the "cheesy" coating of these deep-fried batons of anti-nutrition?

I think not.

With every bite I can feel those puppies actually sucking vitamins and minerals out of my body.

And still I eat them.

Oh be quiet.

Everyone has a personal marker of spring. For some it's the appearance of the first robin; for others it's the first blooms of the lilac. For me, it's standing in a sugar house with the air full of maple-scented steam, watching that amber elixir of spring bubble away in the sugar arch, the greasy, salty taste of cheesy poofs coating my mouth and lips.

Me? Grow up? Not likely.

--Marn

Mileage on the Marnometer: 163.25 miles (262.7 kilometers)
Goal for 2003: 500 miles - 804.5 kilometers