My gym is once again holding a big Hallowe'en party for its members on Oct. 31. The best fitness related Hallowe'en costume will again win a free month's membership.

Free.

Month.

As my three loyal readers probably recall, I won last year with my Zombie Fitness Aerobics Instructor costume. I think the gummi worms crawling over said costume were a particularly vivid touch and well worthy of victory.

We will ignore the fact that no one else dressed up and thus I won by default.

Unfortunately, by dressing up last year I have emboldened other members. There is talk of actual competition. Actual competition! You can well imagine my consternation at this unexpected turn of events.

The pressure is on. And I can't come up with any ideas.

Help me. Somebody help me. I'm dying here. I need inspiration. I need an idea that is cheap (like me) because a month's membership is only worth $45. I'm not interested in spending a buttload of money on a costume.

I have to cross into the U.S. and with homeland security issues that means make-up has to be simple, something I can put on in the parking lot of my gym. I have no interest in arriving at the border in elaborate make-up to find myself staring down the barrel of an alarmed border guard's gun.

Ideas. I need ideas. I am throwing myself on the mercy and creativity of my three loyal readers.

Please, somebody, help a sistah out.

--Marn

Mileage on the Marnometer: 1123.19 miles. Over half way there. Oh, man, please let this be over

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