Other organizations from time to time will beg you to toss some of your hard-earned bling bling into their virtual tin cups, often for worthy causes.

Well, here at MarnCo (the ruthless multinational behind The Big Adventure) we believe in providing our three loyal readers with a quality begging experience. Nosireebob, no virtual tin cups for us when we shake you down. WE issue our peons with actual tin cups, because, you know, We Have Our Standards.

It's just a few weeks before I head off to the Jog for the Jugs in Montreal on Oct. 5, also known as the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation's Run for the Cure. The squinty-eyed, flinty-hearted bean counters at MarnCo are just sick over the fact that we are still $170 short of our goal to extort coax $1,500 out of the pockets of our three loyal readers.

For some of you, donating is a bargain because it is in CANADIAN dollars which for citizens of the U.S. are just slightly more valuable than monopoly money. Yep, donating $5 Canadian will only cost you about $3.60 U.S. or basically one designer coffee.

Show your respect for the rack, your joy in the jugs, Brothers and Sisters TESTIFY FOR THE TA TAS and give some of your buckazoids to the Jog for the Jugs. Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with sprinkles?

Good Lord, what sort of hard-hearted person could resist pretty please with sprinkles?

My thoughts, exactly.

Saturday was my road running day and I can see a cherished goal slipping out of reach. I'm starting to feel that the only way I will ever run 5K/3.1 miles in under 25 minutes is if a flock of flying monkeys exits my posterior and carries me over the course.

Since the odds of monkeys flying out my butt are somewhat long (although I can convincingly simulate the sound of this occurrence by washing down a homemade baked-bean supper with a fine lager), it looks as if I won't meet my speed goal, at least not in time for the race.

I'm pretty disappointed.

However, Saturday I did manage to run it in on my road under 30 minutes for the first time which left me feeling euphoric. Well, you know, euphoric once the agony of that last 50 meters or so wore off.

I figure that running in conditions such as this will make running on a flat city road on Oct. 5 in Montreal seem like a picnic. And, uh, if you know for a fact that it won't help me, please, leave me in ignorance.

I am getting so insanely stoked about this run. I hear there will be somewhere between 7,500 and 9,000 people in Montreal alone running for this cause. It's going to be such a buzz, being in crowd that big focussed on such a positive thing.

I can hardly wait.

--Marn

P.S.--Due to popular demand, behold, the turquoise sewing machine:

P.P.S.--There's THREE new inductees into the Bazonga Boosters Hall o' Fame, kind-hearted souls who have decided to spend some of their hard-earned buckazoids supporting me as I run the Jog for the Jugs Oct. 5 in Montreal.

Some folks have been donating but I don't recognize their names and they haven't e-mailed me to let me know who they are. To you mystery people, I want to say thank you.

All donors can proudly sport the shoddily Photoshopped yet justly coveted red rectangle below.

P.P.S.- That iron woman, Karen is doing an unbelievable 60 MILE WALK FOR BREAST CANCER! If you don't want to sponsor me, perhaps you'd want to sponsor her. Oh, and ***Dave's friend Mary is also doing that walk. Yowza, that makes that 5K Jog for the Jugs seem embarrassingly short.

Mileage on the Marnometer: 433.99 miles (698.5 kilometers)

Goal for 2003: 500 miles - 804.5 kilometers