2000-08-29
Dear Diary:

����There's nothing like keeping an on-line diary to remind you just how exciting your life is. You know, the endless social round, the international travel, those pesky paparazzi.

����Or not.

����My life is just sooooo Or Not.

����And really, what's the point of keeping a diary if you don't think about your life?

����My diary has made me realize I'm getting entirely too predictable.

����Woody Allen's movie, Mighty Aphrodite, got me thinking that maybe a Greek chorus would help. I mean, picture this: Marn wanders into the village, goes to the bank machine, takes out some money for groceries, notices that the balance is getting low. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz so far right?

����BUT, say I do that, and then a 12 man Greek chorus, resplendent in togas and laurel wreaths then steps forward and chants:

����"She took out some dough
����And it filled her with woe
����Because her bank account's low."

����Why, THAT'S a whole other life experience.

����Except ... well, we only have two tiny bedrooms in our log cabin, where are we going to PUT a 12 man Greek chorus? And I only drive a four door Tercel sedan, so transportation becomes a nightmare.

����I guess that right now a Greek chorus just won't work. Sigh.

����You can imagine my distress about this ... I mean, one moment I thought I had come to a major life change, the next all my dreams are dashed on the rocks of practicality. But then ...

����This is the 30th anniversary of the year I graduated from high school. Last night I had my old yearbook out and while I was leafing through the pages wondering, "Hmmm I wonder if ol' what's-his-face can STILL do that Delightful Smashing A Beer Can On His Forehead Thingie?" IT came to me.

����An epiphany. Think Paul on the road to Damascus, think Marn sitting leafing through a yearbook with her headphones on, listening to the soundtrack of those high school years--a soul music compilation tape.

����Cue Gladys Knight and The Pips doing Midnight Train to Georgia and you, too, Can Share The Magic.

����I have come to the realization I need Pips.

����Yep, I need three identically yet snazzily dressed guys with synchronized dance moves to follow me everywhere and comment on my life with a sweet mix of doo wop harmonies and soul music.

����I can fit three guys in my Tercel no sweat. This is a gimme.

����I mean, I LOVE Midnight Train to Georgia, but if you listen to it, it's basically a kind of dull song about a woman who's decided that she'd rather live in the boonies with the man she loves than live a big city life without him. Ho Hum.

����But then you get those Pips and Mr. Man, it's a whole other experience.

����Gladys sings that her man's getting on the train. Yawwwwwwwwn.

����THEN those Pips step up and in perfect harmony, sing "Leaving on that Midnight Train, Woooo -- ooooooo" (the Wooooo -- ooooooo sounding like a train whistle and accompanied by a slick pirouette followed by an arm motion as if they were pulling a train whistle chord.)

����This, I have decided, is what I need in MY life.

����I don't need to challenge or try to change myself.

����Nope.

����That would be work. It Would Be Hard.

����Pips. They'd give me the APPEARANCE of excitement and change without actually having to BE exciting or to change.

����I want my smoke and mirrors and I want them now.

--Marn

Old Drivel - New Drivel


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Want to delve into my sordid past?
She's mellllllllllllllting - Wednesday, Feb. 15, 2012 - Back off, Buble - Monday, Dec. 19, 2011 - Dispersed - Monday, Nov. 28, 2011 - Nothing comes for free - Monday, Nov. 21, 2011 - None of her business - Friday, Nov. 04, 2011 -


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