����Tonight it was comfort food.

����Oh, c'mon, admit it. I know you have some slightly embarrassing food from your childhood that you like to eat. Something that you wouldn't want to admit to your foodie friends, the ones who LIVE to cook and spend their nights in front of the Food Channel obsessing about recipes.

����Oh, all right, I'll go first. Sheesh.

����For me it is the wondrous glop known as whipped potatoes.

����No, not MASHED potatoes, WHIPPED potatoes. Work with me here people, work with me.

����Producing whipped potatoes is very simple:

����1) peel potatoes, removing the skin and thus most of the nutritional value of the potato

����2) boil the potatoes until you have reduced them to utter softness and thereby destroyed most of the remaining nutrients.

����3) remove pan from heat, drain potatoes (pouring whatever tiny amount of nutrients might be left down the sink, dissolved in the water.) Pour in milk, a slight amount of salt and pepper (any other more subtle seasonings are pure heresy) and then beat it all with your egg beaters until it attains the texture of fluffly wallpaper paste or library glue.

����Mmmmmmm whipped potatoes.

����Now that you have actually produced whipped potato goodness, I will explain the intricacies of proper whipped potato consumption.

����After a generous dollop hits your plate with that satisfying thud that only a pure starch, zero nutrition food product can emit, carefully shape it into a mountain.

����Next press a generous pat of butter into the top of your mountain, waiting for it to melt and turn into butter lava. You can guide this lava in little yellow rivulets down the sides of your whipped potato volcano by using your fork tines to create little paths.

����Remember not to completely empty the volcano. That's important.

����After that it's flexible. You can either eat your whipped potatoes simply flavoured with your butter lava rivulets, or you can dip a forkful of potatoes in the heart of the volcanic butter core.

����No, this is NOT playing with your food.

����I'm an adult.

����It's simply the recognized way to eat whipped potatoes.

����That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.