Sunday, Dec. 01, 2002
Dear Diary:

Other women, they ooze charm.

They ooze sensuality.

They ooze competence.

Me, I ooze a mix of Polysporin and orange tattoo ink into my clothing.

Well, aren't you grateful I shared THAT tasty little slice of imagery?

So Day 2 of the tattoo. The daughter has been tending said tattoo for me, gently adding a fresh thin layer of Polysporin every four hours or so during the day.

For you zygotes keeping track, this would be reason #4351 that you are terribly, terribly grateful that I am not my mother.

Does your mother drag you into bathrooms while you're Christmas shopping, make you wash your hands, drag you into the handicapped toilet stall, drop her already semi-dropped pants, and make you apply fresh anti-bacterial cream to the new tattoo which spans her buttal region and her waist?

I THINK NOT.

So the next time your mom is driving you crazy and you think you can't stand it another minute just remember: YOU ARE NOT TAKING CARE OF YOUR MOM'S BUTT.

See?

It's all about perspective.

In other late breaking tattoo news, I have been informed by my daughter that the goanna's paws are scabbing now but the body is still scab free and everything seems to be healing well.

Still keeping track? Got your list handy? This would be reason #4352 that you are terribly, terribly grateful that I'm not your mother.

Think about it. Does your relationship with your mother involve discussing her scabs, let alone scabs on her buttal region?

I THINK NOT.

See?

Like I said before, it's all about perspective.

--Marn

P.S.--If you're doing any of your Christmas shopping at Amazon this year, why not do it through Blue Sphere? Five per cent of what you spend will be donated by Amazon to Blue Sphere, and will be given to the Foster Parents Plan of Canada.

Yep, you get to make a large corporation cough up five per cent of its profits AND at no cost to yourself you get to help some poor kids out. What's not to love about that, eh?

Blue Sphere, moral materialism

NEWSFLASH! Now you get the chance at Canuckistani Hot Chocolate for getting the word out about Blue Sphere. Post a link and you're in the contest. Whatcha waiting for? Huh? HUH?

Old Drivel - New Drivel


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Want to delve into my sordid past?
She's mellllllllllllllting - Wednesday, Feb. 15, 2012 - Back off, Buble - Monday, Dec. 19, 2011 - Dispersed - Monday, Nov. 28, 2011 - Nothing comes for free - Monday, Nov. 21, 2011 - None of her business - Friday, Nov. 04, 2011 -


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This template is a riff on a design by the truly talented Quinn. Because I'm a html 'tard, I got alot of pity coding to modify it from Ms. Kittay, a woman who can make html roll over, beg, and bring her her slippers. The logo goodness comes from the God of Graphics, the Fuhrer of Fonts, the one, the only El Presidente. I smooch you all. The background image is part of a painting called Higher Calling by Carter Goodrich which graced the cover of the Aug. 3, 1998 issue of The New Yorker Magazine.

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�2000, 2001, 2002 Marn. This is me, dagnabbit. You be you.