So I hear that thanks to the six of the nine Supremes it's now legal for consenting adult American penises to boldly go uh, well, you know.

(I desperately, desperately want to make an outr� "Cap'n, he's gonna blow!" joke in a thick Scottish accent--once a Trekkie, always a Trekkie--but my three loyal readers will be relieved to know that I've decided to restrain myself.)

It's part of being a grown up, eh.

Consenting adult Canadian penises were legally given the right to pick the orifice of their choice back in 1968. Our then Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau uttered those famous words: "The state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation" and then went on to reform our abortion, divorce and homosexuality laws.

I was a teenager and I didn't understand what the big deal was. It just made sense to me that every child should be a wanted child, that a person should have a humane way out of a marriage that had died, and that consenting adults should be able to slide Tab A into whatever Slot B made sense to them.

I think part of the problem with homosexuality laws is all sorts of other stuff gets dragged into the discussion that really has no place there. What we're talking about here is Consenting Adults.

Consenting.

Adults.

Take the word consent out of the equation or the word adult out of the equation and you're talking about something completely different. Homophobes often throw that wonderfully incendiary word "pedophilia" into the discussion, a Molotov cocktail that has nothing to do with reforming homosexuality laws, because there's no consent involved and one of the people is not an adult. I know that. You know that. But pedophilia covers an act so ugly that the sheer horror of it creates a smokescreen so dense that the original point is lost.

Which is, of course, why all sorts of extraneous crapola gets dragged into talk of reforming homosexuality laws. Without it, well, we'd have to talk rationally about that least rational of things, S-E-X, and Where's The Fun In That?

My thoughts, exactly.

Want to know the truth? We've been letting our consenting adult homos put their pee pees anywhere they want up here in Canuckistan for 35 years. We have not suffered a complete and utter social breakdown, unless you count the success of C�line Dion AND GOOD LORD THE AMERICANS HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THAT, I JUST KNOW IT, AND YOU CAN'T HOLD HER AGAINST MY COUNTRY FOREVER, CAN YOU???

HUH? HUH??

There, see? From adult sodomy laws to C�line Dion in one paragraph. Isn't playing with words fun?

--Marn

Mileage on the Marnometer: 323.76 miles (521 kilometers)
Goal for 2003: 500 miles - 804.5 kilometers